ALRIGHT BAIZE?...

Massive Nights made it a hat-trick of celebrity signings this week by snapping up snooker legend Jimmy White on a pay-as-you-play deal.

Gaffer Will was delighted to finally snag 'The Whirlwind' after chasing him for months.

"Jimmy is a great signing for us," said Will. "We were at the front of the queue to sign him, and he's definitely in the frame for Sunday's game against Torblaze (TGGS, 6.50pm), although he's not the most athletic of lads and he'll probably need a long rest."

The chairman welcomes Jimmy 'The Whirlwind' White to Massive Nights FC

Will added: "I've always been a massive snooker fan - in fact only yesterday I went round to Vito's house for a couple of frames. Unfortunately, he couldn't find any of the red balls so we spent the afternoon potting the brown instead."